“If you want a friend, you must show yourself to be friendly.” This simple truth, drawn from Proverbs 18:24 KJV, often goes unheeded by those who long for companionship. As a teacher and pastor’s wife, I have observed many lonely individuals—some seeking a boyfriend, girlfriend, or simply a friend. Time and again, I noticed a common thread: many of them were quick to point out others’ faults, yet, slow to extend grace. They desired unconditional acceptance but were unwilling to offer it in return.
The Bible gives us clear guidance on how to treat one another in love. Proverbs 18:24 (NKJV) says, “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Genuine friendships are not one-sided; they are built on mutual kindness, forgiveness, and patience. Jesus teaches us in Matthew 18:21–22 (NIV) that we are to forgive “not seven times, but seventy-seven times,” emphasizing a spirit of continual grace. Friendships require this kind of heart.
However, Scripture also reminds us to be discerning in our relationships. While we are called to love everyone, we are not called to keep close company with those who consistently lead us away from God’s values. 1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV) warns, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” And Psalm 1:1 (ESV) tells us, “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers.” We are to forgive, yes—but we are also to use wisdom in choosing who we allow into our inner circle.
Friendship is a gift and a responsibility. If we desire deep and meaningful connections, we must first cultivate those same qualities within ourselves: kindness, grace, humility, and joy. The best way to attract the right people into your life is to become the kind of person you'd want to be friends with.
Declaration:
I declare that I am a friend who reflects the love of Christ. I forgive freely, love deeply, and treat others with the grace I desire in return. I attract godly, loyal friendships because I walk in love, humility, and discernment.
Prayer:
Heavenly Father, thank You for being the ultimate friend who sticks closer than a brother. Help me become a reflection of Your love to those around me. Teach me to be friendly, forgiving, and gracious. Guard my heart from bitterness or pride, and give me discernment in the relationships I form. Surround me with people who love You and help me grow. I choose to be the kind of friend I desire to have. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
